Ø Thing #1:
Diction Practice = Free Rice (20 minutes)
1. Make sure you’re playing in our class
group!
2. 10,000 grains are due by classtime Friday.
- Thing #2: Revise the Autobiography Poem to a second draft. (worksheet below)
Autobiographical Poem Revision to Second,
Almost-Final Draft
1.
Think about everything I’m saying as it relates to YOUR POEM and the
changes you might make to it to make I stronger.
2.
Look at the following snippets, and consider the following in your own
poem:
· Am I using vivid detail (appealing
to one of the senses)?
· Am I being creative in my
responses—not just throwing down the first thing that comes to mind?
1) Title
·
Raise your hand if you have the word “Me” in your
title.
·
Look at the following titles that do NOT have “Me”
in them. What makes them strong?
·
A Whole
Different Window
·
Casting Into
Carissa’s Life
·
Just Like
the President
·
More Than a
Blonde Cheerleader
·
The Name I
Got, the Name I’ll Keep
2) Line Breaks
We have talked about line breaks
a lot, but I’m wondering how carefully you’ve considered how and why you are
breaking your lines. When you have four
details on a line, it’s hard for the reader to absorb all that. Look carefully at your breaks. Is the word at the end of each line a
powerful one?
Unfortunate older brother
Who
is always blamed for everything
Every
time
* *
* *
Who gives hugs to the people I love
and nothing to the people I don’t particularly like
3) Concrete Detail—SPECIFICS!
(SHOW who you are;
be specific and descriptive; the reader can hear a PERSON there!)
Who needs a faster
internet connection
Some ice cold Mt. Dew
And mostly, crispy, stuffed, Hot Pockets
Who feels great after a
long run by myself
Who would like to see a
Christmas wedding, tinkling lights in the dark cold night.
Lover of the rain
The sweet country air in
the Fall
Sweet-and-sour
filled Twizzlers
And stargazing on those beautiful summer nights
4) Order—what’s first?
Second? Third? It matters!
Who fears staying home
alone at night,
Drowning in a lake when
it’s dark,
And making wrong
decisions throughout my life.
5) Strong Diction
·
Lover of
large rooms illuminated with dim candlelight.
·
Who fears
being an outlier
·
A prisoner
of Washington, Iowa
·
A speck of
dust in Washington
·
He is the
denizen of a glass box (instead of “resident of”)
6) Sibling of….
Sometimes
a best friend,
Sometimes
a complete enemy
But
always a sister of Anne, John, and Michael
Sibling of a future
engineer (Alfonso)
Brother of a librarian
(Angel)
Brother to an annoying
younger sister (Aylin)
The
mature, older (even if younger) sister to a college freshman,
7) Alliteration
·
Who fears
seeing spiders scamper across my floor…. (s)
·
Queen of
quirky (q)
·
With two
smaller siblings (s)
·
Who needs to
sleep as much as a sloth (s)
·
Fat from
wrestling (f)
General Reminders
·
Are all the important words in your title
capitalized?
·
Are your lines broken where you INTENTIONALLY broke
them, for greatest effect?
·
Have you included specifics: examples, colors, textures, sounds, details?
- Thing #3: Review the Writing Buddy expectations for tomorrow, and go over the Autobio Poem template the buddies will use.
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